Why Breakups Are Harder On Guys: The Science Of Heartbreak

Happy couple spending time together

Breakups are never easy, but it is commonly accepted that men have a harder time dealing with them than women. But why is this the case? In this blog post, we’ll look at the science behind why breakups are particularly difficult for guys and how it differs from the female experience of a relationship ending. We’ll explore how men and women experience heartbreak differently, and how to best cope with the pain of a breakup.

The Science Of Breakups

When it comes to breakups, the science behind why it can be so hard for some people has been studied in-depth. Researchers have found that there are a variety of reasons why breakups can be more difficult for some people than others, including differences in how men and women typically deal with them.

For example, studies have shown that when it comes to marriage or divorce, men typically take it harder than women. Men are more likely to experience symptoms of depression after a breakup and they often suffer from feelings of rejection or loss. Additionally, men typically take longer to get over a breakup than women. This can be partially attributed to the fact that men usually have a greater need for intimacy and connection in their relationships than women do.

In addition to marriage and divorce, researchers have also studied how breakups in dating relationships can affect people differently. Studies show that men and women often react differently when faced with a break up in their relationship. Generally speaking, men tend to internalize the pain from a breakup more deeply than women do. They often become angry and frustrated, while women are more likely to feel sad and confused.

Ultimately, breakups can be difficult no matter what type of relationship you were in. However, understanding how each gender typically deals with the pain of heartbreak can help you better understand why your partner may be feeling the way they do, and how best to support them through the process.

How Guys Deal With Breakups

When it comes to breakups, men are often left feeling like the weaker sex. Studies show that they often experience more intense physical and emotional pain than women when going through a breakup, whether it’s from a marriage, divorce, dating relationship, or otherwise.

The same way that different people express grief differently, men also have unique ways of dealing with the pain of a breakup. For some, the only way to cope is to go into avoidance mode, disconnecting from their emotions and pushing away any lingering feelings for their former partner. Others may go to the other extreme and become overly-emotional, letting themselves be consumed by their sadness. In either case, men tend to go through a period of disorientation, confusion and uncertainty in the wake of a breakup.

Many men try to “escape” the pain by engaging in risky or self-destructive behavior such as drinking too much, using drugs, overworking themselves, gambling or engaging in dangerous sports. This is an unhealthy coping mechanism and can have serious negative consequences on their overall wellbeing. Other men may attempt to bury their pain by immersing themselves in a new relationship, only to find themselves unable to emotionally invest in it because of unresolved issues from the prior relationship.

The best way for a man to cope with a breakup is to accept and acknowledge his feelings. It’s important for him to give himself permission to feel his emotions and resist the urge to numb them or deny their existence. Talking with close friends and family members can be an invaluable source of emotional support during this time. Professional counseling can also provide a safe space for men to process their thoughts and feelings and get help managing the difficult emotions that accompany a breakup.


Breakups can be a difficult and emotional experience for anyone, but research suggests that men may find it particularly hard to cope with a breakup. Though the reasons for this vary from person to person, there are some common threads between why men have a harder time dealing with a breakup. From the effects of traditional gender roles to the difficulty in finding an adequate emotional support system, men often feel the sting of a breakup more acutely than women. If you or someone you know is struggling to cope with the aftermath of a breakup, it can be helpful to reach out to a professional like Coach Brad who specializes in relationship counseling. He can help you process your emotions, develop healthy coping strategies, and work through any issues that may have contributed to the divorce, marriage, dating or relationship breakup.